EA Family Play Dumbs Down Wii Controls So Grandpa Can Play

EA, the gaming company we all love to hate (or just plain hate), has come up with a way to drain even more money from even more people. A new feature called EA Family Play will debut with the three main sports titles for 2008 for the Wii, Madden, NBA Live and FIFA Soccer. “FP,” as I have now just nicknamed it, dumbs down the controls to the point where “the console controls the rest.” You, dumb user, simply whip the Wii remote around in only the most basic of movements and Manning will throw a touchdown pass, King James will dunk all over everyone and Messi will dribble from his own half (see above) and score a goal much like Maradona’s most famous one.

Got it? EA FP simplifies the controls to the point where even complete blockheads can think they’re Fatal1ty or whoever the current pro gaming champion is.