Sony's Move Men Are Kind of Jerks

So you’re chilling at your friends house who has a kid and you and all your buds have turned on some LCD Soundsystem and are not drinking at all. And then two dudes come up to the house – two dudes you do not know – wearing bowls on their heads and dressed in Spandex and you’re like “Kyle? Faye?” and they say not one word and then you realize Kyle is in Patagonia and Faye is working tonight at Borders and it turns out these two dudes are the Move Men from Sony and you’re like “Dudes, this is like a private party” and the Move Men slap a Wand in your hand and your mysophobia kicks in and you go and get Dylan, your group’s “big” friend and he comes to the door and the Move Men are motioning something, pointing at you, and Dylan is like “What?” and you still have the Wand but you put it somewhere in the house and you’re so freaked that you forgot where so the Move Men try to go through the door and Dylan says “Stay on the lawn. Who are you people?” and then two of Sony’s PR come up and try to the lead the Move Men away while apologizing and the Move Men, being robots made of fun, are like “These kids stole a Wand. They stole a Wand!” and you’re like “I don’t have a Playstation. I don’t play games. I’m a photographer and I work at a coffee store” and the Move Men are all saying “This sucks. This absolutely sucks. Why did you make us do this?” and most of the people at the party didn’t even notice but you’re so upset all night that you keep washing your hands, over and over, thinking of where the Move Men have been and who handled that Wand before you.