An iDay Retrospective With Snarky Captions

Mr. Spike Lee came out to support the Keep A Child Alive foundation. We know he’s just trying to get one himself.

Nicholas and I looked to escape the chaos that is the 5th Avenue Apple store in fair Gotham to the more tranquil and pleasant SoHo location. It was everything you could ever dream and want in an iDay. Tons of tourists who have no idea what’s going on, but want to participate in whatever the crazy Americans are doing to the snobby hipster-chic folk who snicker and sneer at those wasting their time waiting in line or taking pictures. They secretly want one, but know they can’t admit it, so they weep and run home to Williamsburg. What we found was astonishing and down right STUPID. Won’t you take a journey through my eyes on this here iDay?

What’s going on?! I see…Apple employees. FEH!!!

I was hoping to get a sneak peek of the iPhone, but I had no such luck. It just wasn’t in the stars for me this day. Maybe some other time in some other place on some other iDay.

Spike Lee going into the store.

My heart was all a flutter as they opened the door to let Spike in. It was almost as magical as seeing Transformers last night.

Oh noes, they’re closing the gate!

As the gates slowly started on its descent my heart fell with it. Was this all a dirty trick to attract media attention? The iPhone was just a sham?

Open Sesame

It’s 6PM EST and the iPhone is launching. Yipee!!! I almost wet myself.

What’s he saying about us?

This gentleman appeared on the glass staircase and was most likely rallying up the troops for the onslaught of smelly disgusting people who haven’t showered in days. “Just hold your breath as they pass. Stand Together!”

He’s doing what we’re doing.

This young man was doing exactly what we were doing. It was weird. I kind of tripped out.

Where am I? Who are you? Billy, is that you?

This geriatric had no clue what she was doing. I believe she thought a monster was chasing her up the stairs. She had clearly escaped from the Home and made her way into the line.

It’s finally over!!!

I hope you enjoyed the voyage I took with Nicholas at the SoHo store. We didn’t find tranquility, but we did find a bunch of bafoons standing around taking thousands of pictures of Spike Lee and pushing for no apparent reason. iPhone coverage is officially over for the East Coast. I hope you’re all happy because I know I am. We can finally get back to our regularly scheduled blogging. Have a great weekend, everyone!